india ink blotsI remember when I was younger there was a sort of general consensus around the idea that New Yorkers* were among the most self-obsessed, narcissistic assholes on the planet, especially artist and academic types†. And, I don’t know, maybe that was true.

Things have changed though. Through the power of technology (smart phones, social media, &c) now nearly everyone is a self-obsessed narcissistic asshole— it‘s a goddamned epidemic!

Have you ever run into someone, and you’re like ‘Hey what’s new?’ and they start telling you about some ongoing saga in the middle, because they assume you‘re up-to-date via their posts on Facebook or whatever?

Now that is some self-absorbed narcissistic shit! And it‘s pretty common! Here‘s some homework you can do, in case you‘re feeling a little guilty.

Repetition in ink of "I'm self-absorbed as fuck"

*LA must have been a close second.

†My schoolmates and I (yes, art school) found this notion hilarious and kinda‘ leaned into it for awhile; it seemed a very Fluxus thing to do.

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6 thoughts on “

      1. Well, I know that you weren’t talking about douche-baggery per se. However, a minimum requirement for being a douche is that one be a self-obsessed, narcissistic asshole. So, while not all self-obsessed, narcissistic assholes are douche bags, all douche bags are self-obsessed, narcissistic assholes.

        It therefore stands to reason that the higher a city’s proportion of douche bags, the higher their per-capita abundance of self-obsessed, narcissistic assholes. If a greater percentage of Boston’s population qualifies as douchey than New Yorks, then their proportion of self-obsessed, narcissistic assholes might also be higher.

        Someone seriously needs to conduct a formal study on this topic. Can you imagine how fun it’d be to come up with quantitative measures for douche-baggery and self-obsessed, narcissistic assholeness? I suppose a good measure for the latter category might be average number of selfies taken per day.

      2. Hahaha!! Brilliant assessment of douchery, and I love the idea of a formal study. It could be built around both active participants, as well as empirical observation of subjects in their natural habitats; each cross-referenced with online personas.

      3. Great idea! And in order to keep the participants off the scent of what we’re actually doing, we could tell them we’re studying people who are exceptionally good at picking up women – because two more characteristics of douche bags are that they’re male and they assume that all the women want them.

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